28 MAY 2020
Anhedonia.
It is one of those words people either not aware of at all, or having the, unironically, deepest encounter with.
When sleeping is more fun than anything.
All the things that I forgone.
Sports and drawing was the first I gave up on.
People I have known for less than a decade did not even know. Probably.
How long was it since I last picked up a guitar? Or have the strength with a bass strapped on me?
Music was no longer chords and harmonics or lyrics, it was just a wall between me and anything else. Most of the time I do not even know which band it was.
Later, it came to reading. I cannot tell which page I was on. Having no memory about what I just read a second ago, a week or a year ago.
There were times that I was halfway through a book and just realize I had read it earlier that week.
It was more than reasonable when it comes to writing. I have no idea what BS I have came up with and often repeat myself throughout the text.
Even things like watching playthroughs or some friend's facebook post is a waste of time and energy.
If you don't have friends, you don't get the FOMO (fear of missing out).
Why do I still have friends when I literally send a message once like half a year.
The dreadful terror that haunted me, for years, without an end.
my mom is watching Twilight for real, on TV, in the living room
Is this canine manure worst or is Asian soap opera worst, I cannot tell.
O mother, have mercy! I will not stand the torture anymore!
Scent of the day: The Bug
Track of the day: BELZEBUBS - Cathedrals Of Mourning
It is one of those words people either not aware of at all, or having the, unironically, deepest encounter with.
When sleeping is more fun than anything.
All the things that I forgone.
Sports and drawing was the first I gave up on.
People I have known for less than a decade did not even know. Probably.
How long was it since I last picked up a guitar? Or have the strength with a bass strapped on me?
Music was no longer chords and harmonics or lyrics, it was just a wall between me and anything else. Most of the time I do not even know which band it was.
Later, it came to reading. I cannot tell which page I was on. Having no memory about what I just read a second ago, a week or a year ago.
There were times that I was halfway through a book and just realize I had read it earlier that week.
It was more than reasonable when it comes to writing. I have no idea what BS I have came up with and often repeat myself throughout the text.
Even things like watching playthroughs or some friend's facebook post is a waste of time and energy.
If you don't have friends, you don't get the FOMO (fear of missing out).
Why do I still have friends when I literally send a message once like half a year.
The dreadful terror that haunted me, for years, without an end.
my mom is watching Twilight for real, on TV, in the living room
Is this canine manure worst or is Asian soap opera worst, I cannot tell.
O mother, have mercy! I will not stand the torture anymore!
I then proceed to put on headphones and complain about it on the internet.
Scent of the day: The Bug
I have two older bottles of this because it was discontinued back than.
26 MAY 2020
Je veux dormir! dormir plutôt que vivre!
I wish for eternal slumber, the sweet embrace of oblivion. They say quitters are losers, yet I beg to disagree. One knows that living is suffering, therefore dare to defy the will to live and end the pain.
I wish for eternal slumber, the sweet embrace of oblivion. They say quitters are losers, yet I beg to disagree. One knows that living is suffering, therefore dare to defy the will to live and end the pain.
They say that Hypnos is the brother of Thanatos, that sleep is temporary death. The Greeks view sleep as the closest state to death.
The fear of death, is fear of the unknown.
The fear of losing earthly possessions , Relationships. Everything?
Yet they do not fear sleep. It was, ultimately, fear of having no ctrl + Z no return.
Even if there is a Save & Load system in life I bet it would not be any less sh*tty.
Death is inevitable, yet what would be of life if there is not an end to it?
If there'd be no death, would there be Wille zum Leben still?
The Greeks said the power that put the world to work is Love. Art, and Platonic love, in the place for Wille zum Leben when one'd be immortal perhaps?
The most out of character thing I do, is having a plush rabbit on my bed. (Glasses for scale, it is 1.2m long)
Smells like this. Befitting, right? (Endymion was put into eternal slumber in return for immortality)
Selene (the titan Goddess) and Endymion had a lot of children after he was put to sleep. Is it romantic or just somnophiliac?
Personally, I prefer the EDP over EDC. The EDC is too much citrus for spraying onto a pillow... or plush bunny for that matter.
It has been quite a while since I cut all social network.
It was a bother, a burden, to keep in touch with the world.
When was the last time I was out, not for a doctor's appointment?
A lot of things, memories, that I do not need, had been taken care of. But there was more that I am not capable of getting rid of.
Scent of the day: French Lover
The summer scent of choice. Wild enough to be sprayed all over a metal band's shirt or actual shirt, open collar.
Track of the day: Type O Negative - Anesthesia
The fear of death, is fear of the unknown.
The fear of losing earthly possessions , Relationships. Everything?
Yet they do not fear sleep. It was, ultimately, fear of having no ctrl + Z no return.
Even if there is a Save & Load system in life I bet it would not be any less sh*tty.
Death is inevitable, yet what would be of life if there is not an end to it?
If there'd be no death, would there be Wille zum Leben still?
The Greeks said the power that put the world to work is Love. Art, and Platonic love, in the place for Wille zum Leben when one'd be immortal perhaps?
The most out of character thing I do, is having a plush rabbit on my bed. (Glasses for scale, it is 1.2m long)
 |
| What a pathetic twenty-somethinig years old I am |
Smells like this. Befitting, right? (Endymion was put into eternal slumber in return for immortality)
Selene (the titan Goddess) and Endymion had a lot of children after he was put to sleep. Is it romantic or just somnophiliac?
Personally, I prefer the EDP over EDC. The EDC is too much citrus for spraying onto a pillow... or plush bunny for that matter.
It has been quite a while since I cut all social network.
It was a bother, a burden, to keep in touch with the world.
When was the last time I was out, not for a doctor's appointment?
A lot of things, memories, that I do not need, had been taken care of. But there was more that I am not capable of getting rid of.
Scent of the day: French Lover
The summer scent of choice. Wild enough to be sprayed all over a metal band's shirt or actual shirt, open collar.
Track of the day: Type O Negative - Anesthesia
24 MAY 2020
Whilst browsing the internet, I have came across some avant-grade sarcastic website. here.
The meme is that DHMO is just water
Ironically, it is in the manner many scholarly materials and news were written in. Not to ridicule, but to inform or persuade.
Last night, around midnight, we did some cleaning. The next day, instead of appreciation we were blamed for noise.
It is somewhat illogical, but is an act more of a crime if it was against peace?
Quantum immortality. I have found the idea foolish. It is a unnecessary spin on Schrödinger's cat.
Based on the assumption that quantum multiverse is true and each decision made create a different universe where the alternate outcome happened, if one were to pull the trigger and commit suicide, either the shot was fires and the person is dead or the gun is jammed and the person is alive, it states that when it happened repeatedly, the person is immortal.
The person no longer exist in the universe but is alive in the other. Each time the person dies, there is a alternative universe where the person survived. Therefore immortal.
The urge to facepalm at the logic in this is overwhelming. What contribution to humanity it would make? Not that I can think of.
If 't be true that some fool wholeheartedly believed in the theory and thought themselves to be immortal, firstly it was implied that multiple instances of the being exists in different universe and each instance is created by a situation where an alternate outcome is possible whereas the individual having no idea the alternate universe ever existed.
Yet the universe where the individual died would not seize to exist after the person is dead.
UNLESS... solipsism is true and one is the only reality what exists. Which cannot be either proved or disproved.
Any human being level-headed would be able to sort that out.
I'm done. This is ridiculous.
Scent of the day: English Fern
I use this to battle the odor of damp clothing in the room.
Track of the day: Type O Negative - Everything Dies
Needless to say this is one of my favourite band and I used to play their songs on a surveyor 4 using Pete's tuning.
22 MAY 2020
Congrats on 15th anniversary.
Sound Horizon Around 15th Anniversary Re:Master Production
One can only imagine what is to come beyond the horizons.
In my opinion, it is destined to happen. CD-quality does not hold as much content as hi-res audio and sampling rate does make a difference. Regarding how much tracks and data was in each and every track, Sound Horizon (and Linked Horizon) must found that they are in need of releasing music in hi-res. (Regardless of whether the audience can tell a difference, I feel that respect its production in my humble opinion)
In the hi-fi and head-fi community, many prefer to purchase digital versions of music. Due to the fact that most SH and LH music is not available on streaming services and websites dedicated to selling digital music files (these is, however, an upsampled version of Vanishing Starlight). I am led to believe that his majesty the King and his team prefer hard copies.
To my knowledge, UHQCD or MQA CD is hi-res music (depending on source, might be DSD mastering something like that) MQA (a form of lossless compression that reduce the size of the file and keeps the quality) compressed into to fit into a regular CD. The reason to do so is because unlike BD, CDs do not have the capacity to hold the amount of data hi-res files occupy.
One thing to keep in mind is that if it is played on equipment not supporting hi-res audio, the end result would be listening to audio which sample rate is lower than what it is supposed to be (hi-res).
Furthermore a CD makes ripping much more easier and CD players/ rippers are more accessible and affordable than BD player. To my knowledge most of the people prefer to listen on portable devices. The immensely detailed questionnaire may have played a part in making these decisions.
Whilst waiting on the delivery, one may interest themselves with equipments on the market.
Don't bother asking me for recommandations. I'll just tell you to get SP2000 and CD ripper for convenience sake.
With that sorted, the following would be my personal life update.
If cabin fever is a thing, I am most definitely immune.
Going out require effort. getting oneself dressed takes effort.
People, the worst part of all. Those noisy, filthy, reckless creatures. They stare regardless.
The thing I depend on the most is a mixture of soy protein, oatmeal and soybean milk. Sometimes with beans or nuts for flavour.
It is filling. Convenient. Does not hate the taste of it.
I would loathe a proper meal.
Recent favourite website:
http://www.hplovecraft.com/writings/texts/
https://fleursdumal.org/
The works are public domain and I desperately want the leather-bound version of Lovecraft's work for the sake of not hurting my eyes from computer screens. And to match the other leather or fabric bound classics on my shelf.
Scent of the day: Blazing Mister Sam
For some reason tobacco turn sweet on me. Not a complaint.
Track of the day: "The Dunwich Horror" H.P. Lovecraft classic horror audiobook ― Chilling Tales for Dark Nights
One preferred narration of this particular piece.
20 MAY 2020
The day was uneventful. As usual.
As mentioned earlier on a page on facebook, the author of the blog will terminate all social media accounts except this blog and Facebook.
Facebook is solely kept for sentimental purposes and work.
If anyone wish to contact me in person, please make use of texting and this.
Signal is one preferred programme of mine.
Please keep in mind that I may not respond.
I have been living like a hermit more than what I can recall in my early teenage years. "Dark ages" of mine, if you may.
The pandemic have been my excuse to stay in my coven (of cats and brother) for as long as I desire.
Scent of the day: Glass Eye
Just go read the book or watch it on amazon prime.
Track of the day: Therion - Initials BB
Great song, great cover, great titties.
As mentioned earlier on a page on facebook, the author of the blog will terminate all social media accounts except this blog and Facebook.
Facebook is solely kept for sentimental purposes and work.
If anyone wish to contact me in person, please make use of texting and this.
Signal is one preferred programme of mine.
Please keep in mind that I may not respond.
I have been living like a hermit more than what I can recall in my early teenage years. "Dark ages" of mine, if you may.
The pandemic have been my excuse to stay in my coven (of cats and brother) for as long as I desire.
Scent of the day: Glass Eye
Just go read the book or watch it on amazon prime.
Track of the day: Therion - Initials BB
Great song, great cover, great titties.
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